I found something to scrutinize already!

You’re probably feeling a mix of excitement and proud ness right now that mere minutes after posting my first post on a new blog I found something to pick apart cruelly.  I know I am.

Seriously though, I know this article is British, but I cannot imagine life is that horribly different over there for a college student.  Before we discus, please read.  Or not.  I’ll sum it up for you.

So pretty much the author of this article was like “wow, college students eat really crappy food, why doesn’t some one help them!?”  Which is ridiculous because there are literally hundreds of cookbooks, websites, and YouTube videos showing college kids how to “eat healthier.”  So if it could be done, it would have already been done.  Said article is in no way groundbreaking (although beans on toast?  Never heard of that before).  Also the author decided to say that college students subsist on take out, when the actual reality is more like ramen noodles and peanut butter (or jelly because who ever has both at the same time?) sandwiches. So the “cheap” list is automatically blown out of the water as far as “price point” goes.  My second big problem with this article is that many of the methods they teach for cooking things are just wrong!

But let’s talk about why MOST college students subsist on cheap one-pot processed foods and take out/fast food.

It could be any combination of the following:
1. They literally do not have time to eat because they are in college (this mostly refers to 1st year students and people with challenging majors, as well as people who are paying for their college out-of-pocket and work one or more job.)

2. They literally do not have enough money to eat because they’re: A. paying for school completely by themselves B. they’re paying for school with loans and didn’t take out a lot of extra for food C. books are really expensive.

3. They actually have plenty of time and money, but want to appear like the above two groups.  This seems like a unexceptable reason, but it isn’t.  I mean you live in a tiny dorm with a person who’s too poor to eat.  What are you supposed to do, bring home truffles and fingerling potatoes?

Also, some dorms don’t have cooking facilities.  At all.

So we’ve covered the logistics, let’s go through some of the really bad ones.

8. Soup
This one does make sense, soup is one of the cheapest things to make because you can put whatever you want in it.  However, if you do decide to make soup, know that is not the proper way to caramelize onions for french onion soup.

6. Mushroom risotto
This is seriously the worst one.  First of all, you’re assuming they have a kitchen knife.  Also, “risotto rice?”  There are several verities of rice that can be used for risotto and none is called “risotto rice”.  If it is then please don’t buy it.  And said varieties of rice are not cheap.  Also, making risotto is not “surprisingly easy” and that is most certainly NOT HOW YOU MAKE RISOTTO.  IF YOU EVER MAKE RISOTTO LIKE THAT AND TRY TO FEED IT TO ME I’LL THROW YOUR STICKY RICE MUSH IN YOUR FACE.  RISOTTO IS THE NAPALM OF GRAIN DISHES.

5. Toad in the Hole
Can’t get past the name enough to say anything.  British people are weird.

4. Boiled egg
As far as cost, this is great.  Too bad you just taught them a very incorrect way of boiling an egg.

3. Burgers
I was completely with this one until it said “heat the barbecue(or grill).”  That’s just stupid.  What type of college students are you talking about?  You’re stupid.

2. Fajitas
Again with the knife, and that much fresh produce is not cheap.  The author said in the beginning that they used “math” to figure out that all these recipes were cheaper than eating burgers off a cart every day.  Onion, red pepper, chicken breast, paprika, cumin, tomatoes, chilies, cilantro, cheese, sour cream, and guacamole not to mention salt, pepper, and oil.  No way is that cheaper than burgers.  Sorry “math,” you’re wrong.

In conclusion, young college students usually live in shitty dorms or shittier apartments.  They’re poor, pressed for time, and you can’t save them.

Always,
Sheepgo2heaven

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